Thoraiya DyerThe Folly of Romantic Love
November 13th 2006 09:47
Paul Bohannall, a cultural anthropologist from the University of South California, knows a thing or two why divorce rates soar. Romantic love plays a crucial role. You'd think, "What do scientists know about love, anyway? They're not Harlequin Romance novelists!"
Precisely. But maybe Mr. P.B. has got a point. He says:
For one thing, we believe in romantic love. It began as a Western European notion. As a result, we've made an absolute fetish of love, so that it's very difficult to see that you can have a perfectly satisfactory long-term relationship without it.
Relationships work well in other cultures because they don't have romantic love. There's got to be respect...a capacity to see the other person for what he or she is. But you don't have to "love" to do it well.
When it works, romantic love works better than anything else. When it doesn't, it's the worst trap in the world.
The problem with love is when people make it the backbone of their family system as we do.
But Harlequin Romance paperbacks still sell. Galileo defended heliocentrism theory and didn't win popularity points. How d'ya suppose Mr. P.B. will win here? Well, at least he took his shot.
Precisely. But maybe Mr. P.B. has got a point. He says:
For one thing, we believe in romantic love. It began as a Western European notion. As a result, we've made an absolute fetish of love, so that it's very difficult to see that you can have a perfectly satisfactory long-term relationship without it.
Relationships work well in other cultures because they don't have romantic love. There's got to be respect...a capacity to see the other person for what he or she is. But you don't have to "love" to do it well.
When it works, romantic love works better than anything else. When it doesn't, it's the worst trap in the world.
The problem with love is when people make it the backbone of their family system as we do.
But Harlequin Romance paperbacks still sell. Galileo defended heliocentrism theory and didn't win popularity points. How d'ya suppose Mr. P.B. will win here? Well, at least he took his shot.
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Comment by Deorre
Stress Alive
Man Lessons
Interesting, that.